We saw many familiar faces when we hung out at Niu Niu’s coffee shop. Even when we went to collect parcels at a nearby shop, we would bump into people on the way calling out “You are back!”. It’s heartwarming to be greeted with this kind of warm welcome.
We also made new friends because of Niu Niu. They are all in their twenties or thirties. We enjoyed the young vibe and got to know their worries and woes which all boil down to one thing – trying to live up to or escape the expectation of their parents. This means doing well at school, finding a decent job, get married (the prospective wife or husband has to be approved according to the parents’ traditional standards), own an apartment and have children, etc.
Their dilemmas are further compounded by the current economic downturn and lack of opportunities. Not only fresh graduates are finding it hard to get a job but those who have been in the workforce for ten years or more suddenly find themselves jobless.
It is common practice to buy an apartment when a young couple decide to get married. Despite the slashed property prices due to the major property market bust, many still find the property prices unaffordable. Young people either feel trapped in this hopeless situation as they don’t have the means to satisfy the demands of parents of both side; or many just “lie flat” and do not get involved in any long-term relationship in order not to be bogged down by the traditional values.
As Kin and I both grew up in relatively liberal and open-minded families in Hong Kong, it is hard for us to understand the complexity of moral and societal pressures these young friends face. We are very lucky in the sense that it is simply a personal choice to make the best effort and lead a life we think best for ourselves – without giving much thought to what others think.
But in Mainland China, collective interest weighs far greater than the individual’s. Children are brought up to live the so-called “fulfilled life” of their parents. Even when one physically escapes the scrutiny of one’s family and relatives, one mentally can’t help succumbing to the guilt and collective responsibility.
It may look very clear cut for us when it comes to deciding what’s best for us even though we do have similar values (but to a less strict and controlling manner) since this Confucius concept is pretty ingrained in our upbringing when it comes to respecting parents and seniors and taking care of them. But the “self” still comes before the family and society. But it’s not so easy for our friends to carve their own path without heeding familial obligations. All we can do is listen and share our experience. We appreciate their frankness despite our huge age gap (we are almost as old as their parents) and entirely different backgrounds. We truly treasure this unique opportunity to know more about the younger generation.
The sluggish economy has significantly dampened people’s spending power as they are fretful about savings and job security. The market manifests this sense of anxiety through fierce competition and dramatically pushing prices downward dramatically. Coffee used to be a luxurious item (minimum RMB20 for an Americano) but with the proliferation of independent coffee shops and local coffee shop chains, one can enjoy coffee at a measely price of RMB 8.9.
Three years ago, there were no coffee shops on Guangling Road near Niu Niu’s coffee shop. Now, there are over five coffee shops within a stretch of 500 metres (and not even counting those in the small alleys nearby). Inevitably business is not good except for the peak season or some weekends.
But the downward coffee price trend pales by comparison when I found out the cost of dental services in Yangzhou. I need regular check-up and cleaning as I have periodontal disease. Dental treatment in Hong Kong is notoriously expensive. I’ve always known that prices in China is much more reasonable but I am cautious and always ask friends for reliable recommendations.
I asked our Yangzhou friends and finally went to a well-established local dental clinic chain. I was shocked by the insanely low price. It’s common for restaurants to offer attractive promotions on various service apps. It applies to dental services as well. So, I bought a dental cleaning coupon via the Meituan app for only RMB 51.
After the routine cleaning by the dental hygienist, I said that I would like to have an X ray and check-up. I specifically asked how much it would cost and to my surprise, it’s free of charge. In the end, my 80-minute stay at the clinic which included the X ray, teeth cleaning and check-up only amounted to RMB 51. It costs less than a decent lunch. Just when I thought it couldn’t get any cheaper, Kin also went for a dental cleaning at the other branch of the same chain a few weeks later. I couldn’t believe that it is only RMB24 – half the price of what I paid! My goodness!!
Kin had a tooth implant done almost ten years ago in Hong Kong. The screw broke off one day when he was eating lunch. We consulted with our Chengdu dentist friend and also went to the local dental hospital for examination. They both unanimously advised that he should get the original dentist to fix it as the materials and tools used in Mainland China are likely different. Kin returned to Hong Kong for 10 days to have the tooth fixed and spent some time with our families and friends.
From this one-off incident, we learned first-hand that many dentists in China are professional and helpful. More importantly, some of the Mainland Chinese dental methods and practices are different from Hong Kong (western). What matters most is that one must be resourceful and always ask around for reliable recommendations.
Life in China is super convenient only if one is digitally literate and keeps oneself abreast with the ever-changing apps and social media. You can save a great deal if you are familiar with various service apps and find out the best deals. On the same token, you miss out a lot if you don’t use these apps. More importantly, when to buy or book on-line also makes a huge difference. The key to the game is understanding “when does the free cancellation last till”.
As usual, we stayed much longer in Yangzhou than expected. A lot happened during this time. Another friend Elaine whom we have known for many years came to visit us with her friend in late May. They also fell in love with Niu Niu’s coffee shop. Niu Niu took half a day off to take us to her hometown Gaoyou (高郵) and we saw the beautiful sunset and had dinner inside an old local house.
Then Daisy had a minor infection and we took her to see Monkey’s vet. We also had the sixth-year inspection of our van and a few hiccups including Kin’s tooth implant and our travel fridge broke down.
We wanted to leave soon after Kin returned to Yangzhou in early July. I started bringing stuff back to our van slowly. Then I found out that the fridge broke down. We were not sure if it’s due to the heat as the fridge is fairly new. Anyway, Kin ordered a new one and it was delivered the next day (talking of efficiency).
However, the most unexpected delay happened to me personally. We already had farewell dinner with our friends on 12 July. We were all set to leave the next day. But we didn’t leave. Not the next day, or the day after…
So what happened? It got unbearably hot since mid June. It followed the pattern of being searingly hot for days and then temporarily relieved by a rainy day. Then it was hot all over again and no one dared to be out on the street during the day. We started moving our stuff to our van. But the heat was so intense that we could only stay in the van very briefly at a time at night to re-organise the van.
Then the breeze came one night and I spent almost two hours cleaning and packing in the van. I was soaking wet by the time I finished and went home. I felt fine that night. But the next morning, I felt a chill when I was in the coffee shop which is strange as I usually sit near the air-conditioner to stay cool. It got worse and I had to go back to Niu Niu’s place to rest.
I did not step out of her apartment the next three days. I was so weak and frail. I went to the coffee shop for dinner one night but had to leave soon after dinner as Kin saw my face turning pale after eating. I had a severe case of heat stroke. It hit me hard and took me a whole week to recover.
As I finally made a full recovery, we immediately left the Yangzhou “oven”. We drove northward to Tianjin to meet a friend who spent a month there for a badminton training camp.